“I’m just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.” ~ The Devil Wears Prada
I just watched this movie the other day and this quote stood out to me. It reminds me of all the women striving to lose another pound to look like the required beauty standards of today. The struggle to be skinny enough and the extremes we as women will go to meet those expectations so we are more desirable.
I find myself in this constant struggle. I need to lose the weight I put on over the past few years to improve my health. But I find myself struggling with it more from the beauty point of view than what is really important, the fact I need to lose it for health and happiness. I attempt not to let society taint my judgment on this but it does. And the result makes it harder for me to stay motivated to lose the weight.
I find myself depressed which causes me to overeat and exercise less. I go through good days where I am excellent at getting all my workout in and eating right, then I go through down moods where I binge and sit on my ass. I love working out. I always feel better when I do. More alive and happy. So why do I do this to myself?
I do not have an answer. I understand it is all physiological and I work on it but I have yet to conquer it. I have even seen perfectly beautiful skinny women go through this same struggle. It is the stress of society and the views of men that stress us out to the point of not being healthy.
My goals are to be healthy, including mental health on the subject of weight loss. I know women who workout and eat healthy all the time and society views them as fat. Society forgets all women are not shaped the same. We all look different and no matter how much weight we lose, plastic surgery we have or other body altering things we do, we will all still look different.
That is the beauty of the world. That is what makes each of us unique. Now it is time to celebrate that uniqueness and relish it. I am beautiful as I am. I do want to get my body back in shape and I will. Now I just need to conquer the demons in my head and get things done. I have to love myself unconditionally. Because if I do not, no one else will.